Rant II: Paper friends..... loyalty = zero
It's me again, probably throwing more stuff up on here which
makes me mad, because lets face it, what's the point of sitting back and watching everything get the
better of you?
Today's subject is something that I have fallen foul of several times, especially in the last half a year. It's about people who masquerade as your close friends, yet their real agenda does not involve anyone's best interests except their own. Many of my real mates have always said to me that karma will bite them in the proverbial backside sooner or later but sometimes I struggle to see that.
If I think about what my life was like a year ago, I had two friends in tow of which I shared a lot of things with, you know, the sort of friends who practically constitute being referred to as family. Well they say your true colours emerge eventually, I just never saw it coming. So here are the two case studies that justify why I find it hard to trust most people now:
Case I: N*** (mates with Liam, Sept 2001 - Sept 2006)
We were the best of friends for five years. We did everything together and always stuck by each other, that's what I thought. The truth is that I was his friend/taxi driver for all those five years and he only got hold of me whenever it suited him. For five years I was his lapdog in essence and I was so oblivious to the situation that I just followed willingly and blindly. The turning point was when I caught wind of his many double standards. The story is he was seeing this girl at the start of 2006. She was great, really nice girl and I became really good friends with her. When they broke up he told me that under no circumstance was I to talk to her, had to delete her number and had to delete her from MSN. Out of respect for my friend, I duly obliged. When the roles were reversed, i.e. the girl I was seeing (whom I really fell for) went wrong, did he do the same? Nope. He in fact got even more chummy with her and he knew full well how I felt about her because I confided in him. When I confronted him about it he demanded an apology off me, saying I should regard his judgement all the time. Well I didn't want to kick off about it so I did what I usually did and took him out to the pub with the rest of my friends. He ignored us all evening, played on his phone the whole night and babbled some shit about being a helicopter pilot. When I dropped him off he jumped out the car before I'd even stopped. I decided then that if he wanted me, he'd have to get in contact with me first. That was last september, I'm still waiting....and he still owes me £30 for the holiday we went on last year. So he managed to get a free holiday out of it... Half the people I was friends with now don't talk to me anymore because he's turned them all against me all because I won't let him use me anymore. Now he's left surrounded with people who suck up to him because he's fiendishly good at telling people what they want to hear. I can't stand people like that. I do get frustrated that me and only a few others can see what he's really like. Everyone else falls for his insincere flattery, and I just wish he'd get his come uppance.
Case II: P****** (mates with Liam, Sept 2002 - August 2005, July 2006 - February 2007)
I had a friend whom I worked with at Tesco. He was a little bit slow but still we shared the same goofy sense of humour. At work however he was picked on by the rest of the lads. I defended him and told them to leave him alone. Many people couldn't stand him but I'd convinced everyone that he was alright and to give him a chance. He was another friend I realyl considered close to so much to that fact that I shared lots of private stuff with him. In the summer of 2005, he went and told all my other mates on who went to Tenerife that I'd been mouthing off about all their debauched exploits whilst they were on holiday. I didn't know any details so why he tried to villify me is anyone's guess. I left him to it for about a year but we let by gones be by gones and I got back in constant contact in the following July. This was his last chance I thought. Last february I broke with a girl called Lesley. She was nice but it kinda went wrong and I was left gutted that despite me treating really well for the three weeks we were together, she'd found someone else. I found out two weeks later that person was my friend, who told me via email to repsect him for telling me they were already a couple and I should understand with immenent effect. That was the last straw. Someone whom I had protected and shielded from ridicule can turn around and do that to me? I couldn't take it. I want nothing more to do with him.
The worst part is it was him who told me to leave it and not try and keep her in my life, when the whole time it was him she was seeing.
The word friend to me has become diluted now and the friends I'm with now are the one's I'm sticking with. I consider myself a loyal friend but time and time again I've been walked all over. It hurts more when it's people you trust and they majorly let you down. Since both of these idiots have walked out my life, I've felt so much better. I can smile again. But I won't want anything more to do with these two as long as I draw breath.
End of rant.
Today's subject is something that I have fallen foul of several times, especially in the last half a year. It's about people who masquerade as your close friends, yet their real agenda does not involve anyone's best interests except their own. Many of my real mates have always said to me that karma will bite them in the proverbial backside sooner or later but sometimes I struggle to see that.
If I think about what my life was like a year ago, I had two friends in tow of which I shared a lot of things with, you know, the sort of friends who practically constitute being referred to as family. Well they say your true colours emerge eventually, I just never saw it coming. So here are the two case studies that justify why I find it hard to trust most people now:
Case I: N*** (mates with Liam, Sept 2001 - Sept 2006)
We were the best of friends for five years. We did everything together and always stuck by each other, that's what I thought. The truth is that I was his friend/taxi driver for all those five years and he only got hold of me whenever it suited him. For five years I was his lapdog in essence and I was so oblivious to the situation that I just followed willingly and blindly. The turning point was when I caught wind of his many double standards. The story is he was seeing this girl at the start of 2006. She was great, really nice girl and I became really good friends with her. When they broke up he told me that under no circumstance was I to talk to her, had to delete her number and had to delete her from MSN. Out of respect for my friend, I duly obliged. When the roles were reversed, i.e. the girl I was seeing (whom I really fell for) went wrong, did he do the same? Nope. He in fact got even more chummy with her and he knew full well how I felt about her because I confided in him. When I confronted him about it he demanded an apology off me, saying I should regard his judgement all the time. Well I didn't want to kick off about it so I did what I usually did and took him out to the pub with the rest of my friends. He ignored us all evening, played on his phone the whole night and babbled some shit about being a helicopter pilot. When I dropped him off he jumped out the car before I'd even stopped. I decided then that if he wanted me, he'd have to get in contact with me first. That was last september, I'm still waiting....and he still owes me £30 for the holiday we went on last year. So he managed to get a free holiday out of it... Half the people I was friends with now don't talk to me anymore because he's turned them all against me all because I won't let him use me anymore. Now he's left surrounded with people who suck up to him because he's fiendishly good at telling people what they want to hear. I can't stand people like that. I do get frustrated that me and only a few others can see what he's really like. Everyone else falls for his insincere flattery, and I just wish he'd get his come uppance.
Case II: P****** (mates with Liam, Sept 2002 - August 2005, July 2006 - February 2007)
I had a friend whom I worked with at Tesco. He was a little bit slow but still we shared the same goofy sense of humour. At work however he was picked on by the rest of the lads. I defended him and told them to leave him alone. Many people couldn't stand him but I'd convinced everyone that he was alright and to give him a chance. He was another friend I realyl considered close to so much to that fact that I shared lots of private stuff with him. In the summer of 2005, he went and told all my other mates on who went to Tenerife that I'd been mouthing off about all their debauched exploits whilst they were on holiday. I didn't know any details so why he tried to villify me is anyone's guess. I left him to it for about a year but we let by gones be by gones and I got back in constant contact in the following July. This was his last chance I thought. Last february I broke with a girl called Lesley. She was nice but it kinda went wrong and I was left gutted that despite me treating really well for the three weeks we were together, she'd found someone else. I found out two weeks later that person was my friend, who told me via email to repsect him for telling me they were already a couple and I should understand with immenent effect. That was the last straw. Someone whom I had protected and shielded from ridicule can turn around and do that to me? I couldn't take it. I want nothing more to do with him.
The worst part is it was him who told me to leave it and not try and keep her in my life, when the whole time it was him she was seeing.
The word friend to me has become diluted now and the friends I'm with now are the one's I'm sticking with. I consider myself a loyal friend but time and time again I've been walked all over. It hurts more when it's people you trust and they majorly let you down. Since both of these idiots have walked out my life, I've felt so much better. I can smile again. But I won't want anything more to do with these two as long as I draw breath.
End of rant.
1 Comment:
Hiya Syn,
Im sorry to read that you have had a few bum deals with your so called friends, dont let that get you down though. You always meet with the opportunist, who will use you to further his/her own needs and call you a friend whilst it suits them. Then, dump on you from a great height at their convenience. Leave them behind you! Look to your true friends for help and support they will always be there.
I had a similar experience to yours last year (case 2) and thought that the world had come to an end. With the help of my real friends and family I managed to move on get my life back together again.
This made me think "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - Martin Luther King Jr.
All the best, team mate, Jo.
By drivemecrazy, Jun 25 07 4:24 AM